Free labor?

Today was house cleaning day. We rarely have a day like this. Not that we don't clean house. We do. We just typically do it in smaller "chunks" throughout the week. Well, we were busy or away from home all week, so by the weekend, things felt like they were coming apart at the seams. Every room needed some major attention. So we worked. All. Day. Long. And then we took a walk to the grocery store for ice cream (I am quite sure we deserved this treat after all the calories we burned today.)
All this cleaning made me think about how important our kids are to our household. Not just important, but essential to the day to day functioning of our house. Sure, they do their share of making messes (ok, some of them do more than their share, but I won't mention names), but they also do their share of cleaning up. Chores are in the daily vocabulary of our kids.
All the kids (even the 18 month old) do chores, based on their age and/or ability level. Here is Jedrek helping with the mopping today.
It's important to train them young!
And here is a rare moment of all three kids working together to empty the dishwasher.

(That strange green thing hanging from the cabinet on the right is a "question mark." It was my idea to reduce the number of interruptions, or at least inappropriate interruptions, while I am on the phone. The kids are supposed to put this question mark on my arm and then wait patiently while I get to a break in the conversation and pause to answer their question. Key word here is "supposed to.")

Anyway, back to the task at hand (pun intended). Here are some of the chores that my kids do regularly:

Laundry--putting it in the washing machine (right side out), folding and putting it away in drawers.

Emptying the dishwasher (I rarely empty the dishwasher anymore. However, FILLING the dishwasher is another story)

Cleaning the bathroom--the older two do this together and more or less independently

Getting the mail/newspaper

Cleaning up toys

Taking out trash and compost

Vaccuming

Shaking out rugs

Cleaning their bedrooms

Clean off the front and back porch

Washing windows

Dusting

My oldest child is nine. Even the 18 month old puts away his own shoes and helps pick up toys occasionally. By the time he is two, I expect he will be putting away his own laundry and helping with some of the other jobs listed above.

Wow, now that I see this list I wonder what I do all day. Oh yeah, I follow behind and make sure these jobs are done right!

My point is that my kids do a lot of work (just ask them they will tell you). I believe that the way to make kids feel a sense of worth and belonging is to give them real jobs and a real place in the family.

That, plus making the kids do all the work gives me more time for watching soap operas and eating bonbons (NOT).

Fall projects

The last couple of years in the fall, not much has gotten done in the "outdoor" area of our property. Two years ago I was pregnant and we had two foster children along with our own two children (ages 2, 3, 4 and 7 altogether), and last year I spent most of the fall in the hospital with our baby who was going through his cancer treatment. This year we are finally home, not pregnant, and with only three children...time to get to work.

Not too long ago (August, I think it was), I was lamenting to my girlfriend Jennifer about how many, many projects we had to do this fall and how there was NO WAY we would ever get them all done. Remember, this was August...fall hadn't even started yet.

Just a few days ago I realized that we had already completed nearly all the outdoor projects we had set out to do.

First, we pruned the Red Bud tree in the side yard. This was a "little" tree I bought at the local farmer's market for $3 a couple of years ago. We thought it had died the first year, but then it came back. This year it has really taken off! I pruned at least half of the branches and this is what was left.The next pruning project was the forsynthia bush at the corner of the house. This thing grows like a WEED! My dad pruned it back drastically last year, and this year I pruned at least half of it again...and it is still this big! This bush was a gift from the backyard of a friend a few years ago (we don't like to spend much money on landscaping!)This next project was a long time coming, but you can't tell from the picture! We have a very large rock in our front yard (we do live in ROCKingham county). Since we could not move the rock, it has become my flower bed. I had beautiful phlox planted here, but the grass was taking over the phlox, so I decided to dig it all up and start over. And, since it was now an empty bed, I finally planted spring bulbs. Hopefully next April or May I will be able to show you a picture of daffodils, tulips, and other beautiful flowers instead of this picture of, basically, dirt.

Now, for one of my most anticipated projects for next spring...my strawberry bed! After years of working at the side yard to get rid of crab grass (or wire grass, I'm not sure what it's called, I just know that I HATE it!), I finally decided that it was time to plant strawberries (and it didn't hurt that my girlfriend Jennifer was ready to get rid of some of her strawberry runners). Come next June I hope to be indulging in some fresh red berries!Our front yard has needed a tree for a while. A Weeping Cherry tree, to be exact. I actually wanted to plant it the year we built the house so it would kind of "grow up" with the house (I know houses don't really grow, but you know what I mean). Anyway, 5 and a half years later, the tree finally got planted. Following our theme of being "thrifty," we bought it from a local greenhouse which has an annual fall half price sale. My loving husband agreed to dig a hole and plant the tree if I drove out to buy it and bring it home in our mini-van. So, I piled all three kids in the van and off I went. If you are like me and have doubts about whether a 6 foot tree will fit in a mini-van, you are mistaken. It most certainly CAN fit in a van and as a side benefit, it can provide driving entertainment for your toddler who can take the leaves off one by one all the way home. This leads to even greater entertainment as your 9 year old tries to keep the toddler from taking the leaves off the tree all the way home. We somehow managed to get the tree home and in the ground with at least a few leaves still attached.
Ok, so those are the major projects that we have finished so far (and fall just barely started, what WAS I stressing about?)

Here is one of the remaining projects...my overgrown flower garden which will soon become an herb garden. The corner of this flowerbed has a gorgeous Bleeding Heart that flowers all spring. This plant is significant because it was NOT given to us, nor did we purchase it at half price...
We transplanted it when we moved from our old house five years ago. We really are cheapskates when it comes to landscaping.

We don't bite!

Ok, so I am not usually one who is very outspoken about my political choices. In fact, until I am sure you agree with me, I usually don't say anything at all. So, it was very unusual for us that for the first time EVER, we actually put a political sign in our front yard. Then, when we had a local campaigner stop by our house, one sign became two...

Having a 9 year old during this election season has really helped us focus on the reasons we are supporting this candidate. Justus asks lots and lots of questions about the political process, the political parties, voting, etc., So, it has been very hard to explain why mysteriously two signs have now become one...

So, what happened to this second sign? A number of possibilities cross my mind: 1) It got blown away in the wind, so far that it was nowhere to be seen in our neighborhood (and the other sign was just so much more securely grounded that it stayed put), 2) Some local teenagers were pulling a prank (and picked JUST our house, and JUST one sign), 3) The sign was relocated to a more visible area by a do-gooder (this is Optimist Wayne's idea), or 4) Someone, presumably a neighbor, came into our yard and removed this sign because they disagreed with our political position.

For me, reason number 4 is the most disturbing. I can understand, and even value, the fact that we do not all agree on all issues (in fact we don't all agree on any issue). As a mediator and one trained in conflict, I see a tremendous value in having differences of opinion...for if it were not for that, life were certainly be boring, to say the least. However, I can't, or don't want to, understand why a person would choose to come on someone's property and actually take away (literally) our freedom of speech. Instead, I wish that person would have come up to our door, rung the doorbell, and engaged us in a conversation about the reason's for our decision. Then we could also have the conversation about why and how they come to the political decisions that they have.

My guess is that people often do not engage others because of fear. I know that is why I often do not bring up topics of conflict. However, if we could just address each other as people of value and worth, expressing our opinions, but being kind while doing so, my guess is that we would both learn something.

So, if you don't agree with our position and voting preference (and I would daresay some of you reading this do not), or any other topic, for that matter, PLEASE talk to us, engage us in conversation, even tell us you think we are flat out wrong...just don't take our sign.

Trust me, we don't bite! (Ok, except for our 18 month old, but that is just in rare circumstances and we would keep him contained during our entire conversation...I promise!)

Pink Applesauce

Last weekend I went to the local orchard and bought 6 bushels of apples.
For years, my girlfriend Laurel and I have gotten together each fall to make applesauce. As our families have grown, so has our applesauce-making. This year we made 5 bushels of apples into sauce.
Since I did not grow up making applesauce, I have left it to Laurel to determine the best apples. So far, she has been right on target! In our opinion, the best local apples for making "pink" applesauce are Red Rome. We can only find them at one local orchard and they are only available for a very short time. But when we get the right apples...YUM!

Now, since we have to make more and more sauce as the children get older, the way we work it out (without killing our backs in the meantime) is to get the children to help more and more.

First, we wash the apples--a bushel at a time in a big sink of water. By "we" I mean "the kids." This is the earliest job for the children. Once they can walk, they can help put apples into the sink to wash. By the time they can reach into the sink from the bench, they can run a rag over the apples. For the past several years, my girlfriend and I have not had to wash a single apple.
Next comes the cutting. This is probably the most time-consuming part of the process. However, as you will see later, all we need to do is cut the apples into quarters, the Victorian strainer will do the rest.After the apples are cut, they are put on the stove to boil with some water until they are nice and tender.The next step is to put the cooked, soft apples through the Victorian strainer. This is another part of the job where kids come in handy (see my smiley girl Jalyn). I think the kids actually enjoy this part of the job and would do it more if it wasn't taking away the playtime they have with each other. Next, we mash down the apples into the strainer...And this is what comes out...beautiful, pink applesauce!The next step is the quickest of all. We add just a touch of sugar and ladle the warm applesauce into the containers for the freezer!
This year's total was approximately 37 quarts of canned applesauce (for Laurel's family) and approximately 70 containers (varying from a pint to a quart) of frozen applesauce for my family. This does not count the many apples consumed by our hungry children throughout the day (we did stop to feed them lunch).
Now, what to do with that last bushel of apples...

Bright Blues to match his Baby Blues

...or "Hearing Aids and a One Year Old"

So, as most of you who follow Jedrek's caringbridge site know, we now have hearing aids for our 17 month old. At this point we are just trying to acclimate Jedrek to the hearing aids at home before we venture out in public with them. So, since it may be a while before you all get to see Jedrek in person with the new "bright blue" hearing aids, here are some pictures:


These are by far the most expensive accessory anyone in our family has ever owned, so we are are taking extra precautions to make sure they are not lost! The hearing aids came with this cord which clips onto Jedrek's clothes and should catch the hearing aids if they fall out. So far it has probably saved us 4.7 hours of time in searching for the hearing aids based on the number of times they have "popped" out of his ears (in just two days)!
This is a close-up of one of the hearing aids.

This is the whole "contraption" for now (until Jedrek is older and we don't need to worry as much about the hearing aids falling off.)
The hearing aid kit even came with this toy Otter who has his own hearing aids!
And here is what Jedrek thinks of the whole thing!

Actually, he almost always puts on that cheesy grin when a camera gets close. So far, Jedrek doesn't seem to mind the hearing aids too much, but he has only had them in for short periods of time for a couple of days. I guess we will see...

One hearing evaluation: $200

One set of bright blue hearing aids: $4,590

One healthy baby Jedrek: Priceless!

Spontaneity (with a little pre-planning)

Back when Wayne and I were newly married, we were spontaneous.


For example, one time, on a whim on a Friday night, we left Virginia to drive to Maine for dinner. From the time we decided to make the trip (it was sort of a challenge between us, we both thought the other would come to their senses first) we had left in one hour, bags packed and ready for a road trip. We drove to Maine, ate a seafood dinner at the first seaside restaraunt we came to, turned the car around and returned home...all within 48 hours. And Wayne went to work the next day. Of course, gas prices were a bit cheaper then!



Another time we drove from Kansas to Texas for Easter weekend at the last minute because our original plans were cancelled. That time our car broke down, majorly, and we had to rent a Hertz moving van to get back home (we didn't have that much stuff, it was just cheapest one-way solution).



Then came kids.



Don't get me wrong, kids are great (usually), but they do throw a little wrench into "sponteneity." Now, if we want to go somewhere we have to pack toothbrushes times 5, diapers, toys and books for the car, snacks, etc., etc., etc. So our spontaneity has been sorely lacking these last 9 plus years.

This weekend we renewed our quest to be spontaneous! We decided on Friday night that we would take a daytrip to Washington D.C. to see the Museum of Natural History. We packed a diaper bag and several snacks and drinks. Unfortunatly we did not pack a map, figuring we had been to D.C. often enough that we did not need one. We didn't tell the kids we were going, but just woke them up Saturday and told them to get ready to go to "school" (since we homeschool we can define this quite broadly) They didn't guess what we were doing until we were all the way to D.C.

The reason we picked this particular trip was that we had watched "Night at the Museum" last weekend (a movie were the museum characters come to life after dark) and the kids were begging all week to go to a natural history museum...so we decided to strike while the iron was hot.

The trip was great, with the exception of some frustration finding a parking spot and getting lost several times in the process. Well, not exactly lost, just not quite where we wanted to be at that particular point in time.

We only got caught outside in one rainstorm...but you know who we are...







THE RAIN DANCERS!







Even Wayne joined in!






I chose to just watch from the bench under the trees and take pictures (I prefer staying dry when I can!)

The mall in D.C. was particularly busy with some sort of "festival of the book" with many tents set up, speakers, high security, etc. We just walked on past the festival on our way to the museum and only found out much later that we passed up many famous adult and children's author's who were in town for book signings and speeches. In fact, my most favorite author ever, Alexander McCall Smith, was there probably at the exact moment we were crossing the mall. Oh well...I guess stuff like that has to be planned.



The bonus for the day for us was meeting a family up near D.C. of a little baby boy who has recently been going through treatment for hepatoblastoma (the same cancer that Jedrek had). He happened to be in the hospital that was right on our way home, so we stopped in and got to meet them in person. They were super-nice and it was so nice to be able to offer hope and information to another family who is in a similar situation as us.

Here I go!

Welcome to my blog! I have been thinking and planning to do this for some time now, but it has taken me a while to actually get started. I want to write a little bit of background for anyone who doesn't know me (or doesn't know me well).


I will start with explaining why I called this blog "rain-dancers." A couple of years ago I heard the quote that is at the top of this blog about learning to dance in the rain. It really resonated with me at the time because we had just taken on 2 small foster children, I was pregnant with our third child, and my husband had just found out his brain tumor, which had been "quiet" for 5 years, decided to "act up" again and he was back on chemotherapy. Sometimes I wondered if we were crazy (ok, so I wonder that a lot) to take on so much in our lives. But if we had spent the last years of our marriage and life just "waiting for the storm to pass," we would not have enjoyed and experienced all that life had to offer "in the rain." (Ok, I'll stop with the analogies now).


Several years ago I took a "Stress Test" in which I marked any major life event that happened in the recent past (good and bad) and applied a score to it. In school I liked to score high on tests, and this one was no exception. Let me just highlight a few events from the past two decades:


1992--Got married
1993--I Graduated from college, moved to another state
1994-1995 (Pretty quiet)
1996--My husband graduated from college, we moved to another state again
1997--My husband's father died from prostate cancer
1998--My mother died after a long battle with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma and the aftereffects of treatment
1999--Our first child was born
2000--My husband was diagnosed with a brain tumor
2001-2002 (Pretty quiet)
2003--Our second child was born, moved to a new house that we had built
2004-2005 (Pretty quiet)
2006--After 5 years of being asleep, my husband's tumor "woke up" and he began treatment again, also we took in 2 foster children for six months
2007--Our third child was born and at age 3 months, was diagnosed with hepatoblastoma (a rare form of childhood liver cancer).
2008--what's next???

When we found out our baby had cancer, we started a caringbridge site. We found this website was a great way to communicate with many people at the same time about the significant events in his treatment. However, I often found myself wanting to say more about us, not just as it relates to our child and his medical condition. Then, two of my good friends started blogging. Well, as I read their blogs daily, I became jealous of how much fun they were having and decided that I should join the fun!

I am hoping that with the words and pictures on this blog I can be more connected with people far away (as well as those close to home!). I may only update this blog occasionally, or I may decide it is so much fun that I update several times a day--check in when you can! As I keep you more updated on our lives, please feel free to comment or email me (or call, or write, or visit) to let me know what is going on in your life!